Religion, Race, and Nationality in the Obama Era

Image by futureatlas.com via FlickrOur first black president. That is what a lot of people are calling Barack Obama. He seems to include himself among those who identify him not as mixed race, not as white who happens to have an African father, not as Hawaiian, not as any of the identities in the melting pot of identities that he could adopt if he chose, but as black.
I personally believe that his choice was a powerful one which will bring all Americans closer to a level of acceptance and respect for one another that has often been coloured by color. The absolute hopefulness that a black man becoming president represents is one of those things that, as one British journalist put it, could only happen in America.
What I find truly amazing about Obama, and also really hopeful, is the way that he has, as much as Jay Gatsby, defined who he is in the world. Half American, half Kenyan, yet here he is as the pillar of American conciousness. A middle name of Hussein, and a mother whose religious beliefs were quite open and free, Obama chose to be a Christian, and a Christian whose flavour of Christianity is deeply rooted in an African-American culture. Half white, half black, yet look at his diction, at his mannerisms, at his rhetoric, and it is clear that he has made a conscious and sustained effort to behave as a black man. Nowhere in his speech can you hear the Hawaiian influences, despite him having grown up there. In fact, you hear the speech of an urban black man, and specifically an urban black man from Chicago. That, despite the fact that he was raised by a white grandmother from Kansas. But he had choices, and he made choices. Certainly, as a half black man in America, the perception would probably always be there that he was 'black.' Obama chose to make that a positive thing, though, to embrace that identity that was assumed, no matter how at variance it may have been at first with who he 'really' was, how he was raised. That America accepts and believes in those choices is itself a very hopeful thing.
My own family is just such a melting pot, and for the sake of my son, half Japanese, half American, being raised in the UK, and my neice, who had a similar background to Obama, right down to being brought up in one of the last two states in the Union, today is a very hopeful day in the history of America. It is the day that a man who chose to be black has become president. That a man who chose to be American became president. That his choices were not only accepted, but embraced, is a cause for celebration. This is the America that I feel immensly proud of, the America whose ideal is hope, the America that, should my son choose it, is a country where not genetics, background, language, or anything else determines who we are, but where we make choices about all of those things.
There is a lot of hope in that. A lot of hope that real change, a time when none of those things even matter, is just that much closer to reality. We aren't there yet, but today, January 20th, 2009, we just stepped closer.

Dinner with a friend

Ray is a friend that I have had since I came to the UK. When I first came here, he was working on my team at Vodafone. We hit it off, and the first six months, working together, were fantastic. It was wonderful working with someone that I like and respect as much as I do Ray.
I was forced to cancel the contract that he was on, which wasn't great, and there was some drama about a subsequent project, which ended with my boss trying to take advantage of Ray. I made sure that didn't happen, but we didn't work together for quite awhile.
We did, however, stay in touch, and meet up to talk or have the odd beer, and continue to be friends. He is involved with us on a business basis again, but I don't have so much to do with that, since it is more 'strategic', which I don't have much to do with anymore.
But we are still friends. He knew I was feeling down, and tried to get me out of myself for the evening, which I really appreciate. To be honest, he has his own stuff to deal with, so it was quite generous to be thinking about mine.
I really enjoy the chance to just talk to him. We had a great dinner tonight at the Black Swan in Ockham, Surrey. He is a kind of mentor, and talking with him helps me clarify where I am. He has helped me negotiate life in the UK, and working in a big company on many occasions. I feel lucky to have a friend like him.
Besides some shitty stuff happening, he also has some really exciting things happening, and is starting a new company, vPod, which I am sure will do great. Hearing him talk about this, also, was good. It gives me a really good feeling to see someone I know doing something so exciting. Something that I have been involved in, at least to a small degree.

Switching off

Image by _Blaster_ via FlickrI might have mentioned that I have been working quite a lot lately. In return for that, I decided to take some time of in lieu of the weekends missed and the overtime worked. I didn't go to work yesterday, and am not due back until next Tuesday. I don't think that will totally cover what I worked, but will take the rest later.
Yesterday, though, I still worked a couple of hours in total, and it wasn't much of a day off. Even standing watching my son's rugby practise, I got a call from a certain wanker at work. Why I took it, I can't say exactly. We had an arugment, and it was based on his assumption, patently wrong, that I am always trying to weasle out of work and laying it on his guys. I really shouldn't have answered. (...thinking about it just now really pissed me off, and I wrote him a nasty e-mail, which I didn't send...I will wait until I see him in person to tell him off).
After yesterday, I wrote to my boss, and said that I would be turning off my phone, and not answering any e-mails. I actually found that quite hard, as there is a fairly big problem that is really impacting our area. I didn't do very much, but it was a conscious decision, and it was hard to pull back from.
I have e-mail on my phone, which is not a good thing, as it means that I am always aware of the communication that is going on, even in my absence. Working for a mobile phone company, there seems to be a tacit acceptance for employees to use their company phone as their single phone, though they can't put that down in writing, or income tax would have to be paid on it. So, even when I am not working, I am available, because I carry my phone with me.
I never thought of it as that unhealthy, since I work less here than I did in Japan, and definitely have a much better work-life balance. But I am starting to think that I should probably get my own phone, and really turn my work one off when I am not working. Not look at e-mails, and really get my head out of it. This has been awhile coming. On my first holiday, to the Algarve, two and a half years ago, I had my PC and really was upset at my then-boss. Fourteen months ago, when I went to Japan, I carried my phone and PC, and answered work e-mails, and last summer in Italy, with my mom over, I also answered e-mails, though since it was in August there weren't that many.
I think the difference is that this time I can't seem to extricate my own head from it as easily, partially because there is a lot going on, but also because I have been working more than usual, and suddenly switching that off isn't easy.
I will check e-mails tomorrow, though, as I made a bet that layoffs would be announced, and I just want to see if I won the £5. Every little helps.
Speaking of which, Tescos have a deal on energy-saving lightbulbs at the moment that is incredible: I got 5 20w (equivalent to a 100w incandecent bulb) bulbs for £.29. Yes, that is 29p! That is on their own-brand ones, but on GE ones they have another deal--buy one get two free. Bizarre, but very nice. I may be back there tomorrow for some more, though if one believes what is on the label, they also last for 10 years, and therefore I only need as many as I need.
In the end, I probably need a longer holiday to completely switch off. But at least if I am still switched on, I am not wasting energy. ;-)

Poor and hopeless

My wife doesn't much like the UK. There are a lot of things she doesn't like:

• The food. Pub food is generally overpriced and of quite low quality, restaurants are generally expensive, and we don't have lots of money to go out.
• The people. She is Japanese, and can't get used to the laissez faire attitude of Britons. There is just not enough care given where there should be, and the attitude of people is generally not what she would consider 'majime', or serious enough.
  
• The weather. Actually, I disagree with her there, which is quite incredible considering some of the weather-related disasters that have really disrupted my life here, but she doesn't like the rain, and cold, cloudy weather. Fair enough, but I grew up in Oregon, which is pretty much the same.

I remember suggesting some good things about Britain to her:

• The motorways are free and generally quite fast.
• The Indian food is good.
• There are many free museums in London.
• There are some really beautiful villages and countryside.
• Our son can learn English.

Alas, my arguments in favour of our adopted home, while she agreed with most, failed to change her mind. Her comment was something like "if the food, weather, and people are bad, what could you possibly say to change my mind?" Nothing, apparently.

To be honest, I have a significantly less judgemental, and more nuanced view of both the people and the food of Britain. I have lived in four different countries for significant periods, now, and if one went around saying 'everything sucks in this place', you would definitely be miserable. Exhibit 1: My wife.

My own feeling is that there are good things and bad things about this place, like anywhere else. I am not willing, for my own happiness and sanity, to come down on the side of "the bad outweigh the good in this place." However, there is one thing that I truly do not like about living here: Being poor. The taxes are applied in such a way that, if you were a married couple, and both working, earning £30,000 each per year, you would be about £6,000 per year better off than if just one were working and earning £60,000. That is £500 per month!

Even earning a good salary here, I feel really poor. Well, not only feel poor, but am poor: At the moment, I am £2 overdrawn, with 17 days to go to pay day. This is not the result of profligate spending, though of course I did spend some money on Christmas. It is the result of rising gas and electricity prices, as well as some weird timing: Our company pays out our December salary on the 22nd of December, which was almost 3 weeks ago.

I reduced my combined television, internet, and phone bill from £68 per month to £22. I sold back 9 annual leave days to my company for an after-tax monthly salary increase of about £90 (which is no problem, if you saw my blog post from Monday--I have already earned most of those days back as time off in lieu, and last year and the year before I barely used any paid holidays). I have done economising where it could be done. But I am still £2 overdrawn. Ok, sure, I am putting the maximum amount into company savings plans every month, about £350, which will hopefully increase in value, but are pretty safe to maintain value, and also avoid some of my income tax bill. By later next year, some of this money will be available, and I will hopefully be a little richer than I am now. Hopefully.

However, in this area, the area of hope, Britain does a woefully poor job of increasing the hope of people. It is interesting, people are pathologically afraid to utter positive or hopeful words in this country, and if such words should, by some miracle, pass their lips, they hurry to "knock on wood," that the utterance won't cause the thing they hope for to disappear. Talk about expecting the worst! I got a dose of, perhaps, why people may have this attitude last week:
I did my taxes several months ago, and calculated that the government owed me some money. The calculations were done quite carefully, and using formulae that the accounting firm hired by my company to do my taxes for the last two years had used. I received the incredible news, however, that they believed that I owed £2,000. They ignored an important aspect of my return, and one that I did in exactly the prescribed legal way, and sent me a bill saying that I owe this amount by January 31st, even though they can't give me a formal accounting of why I owe it by that time, because they are busy! I am still liable to a £100 fine if I don't pay it by then.
I won't say the U.S. is better, because I don't think it is. Japan is, though. Their tax authorities don't see it as their job to grab every last penny for the government, only to take what is absolutely necessary to provide essential services. It is much easier to hope there that if I do well it won't all be taken from me. It is also much easier (and cheaper) to not feel poor. There isn't the same sense that anything good that I might have, or that might happen, will be taken by a cynical government.

My wife wants to return to Japan this year. I have opposed that, at least until there is some payout on the savings that I have been doing in my company's plans this summer. I am not particularly money-oriented, but I have to admit that, the day after I finished working a 70-hour week, being overdrawn by £2 really sucks. This constant struggle is beginning to weigh on me, though. Maybe it is time to go back...

Comment: Tesco: 'Wal-Mart's Worst Nightmare'

This story does a really good job of pointing out Tesco's strong points:
1. Their own brands are really excellent, and do a great job of meeting the needs of customers. The 'Tesco's Finest' brands are as good as you will find, though of course at a premium price. But they are good, and customers actually trust the quality, and so are willing to pay that price. They do a much better job at the higher end than Walmart or Asda, and since that is where the margins are better, that puts them, whether they are number the two or three largest supermarket chain, in a better position EBITDA-wise, which in this market is pretty crucial.
2. They are also a lot more flexible in their format, which they need to be in Europe, where space is dearer. That ability to adapt to different markets with flexible formats also puts them in a good position to challenge Walmart.
3. Finally, Walmart has an abysmal record overseas. They pulled out of Germany, their Japanese operation is, to say the least, far from ambitous, and the only geographies where they have had consistent success is the Americas. I wouldn't say that Tesco is far and away better in this regard, but Walmart is clearly weak.
Link to original story:
http://www.businessweek.com/globalbiz/content/dec2008/gb20081229_497909.htm?link_position=link1

Holiday Shmoliday!

Despite being able to see the fireworks at New Years, which was great, and you can read about below, I didn't get much of a holiday. My company made a big move today to an office in Paddington, and I have been responsible for a fairly sizable videoconferencing, audio conferencing phones, and audio visual installation, as well as a new room booking system used for managing all of that. Today was go-live, but what that has meant is that I have worked my behind off all of those days leading up to this one. Last night I worked until 2 am to try to make sure that everything was working. It wasn't, in the end, but enough that I could put it off to today.
I only slept about an hour or two last night, as working 18 hours straight created so much adrenalin that it took me a couple hours to fall asleep. I was up at 6:30 to be in the office at 7 and move trash and tidy up, something I and my contractors had been too tired to do last night.
I definitely need a break. Big time. I will probably be solving remaining issues for the rest of this week, but expect to take of a week or two after that. It wasn't great for my son, though, since his school holidays finished today. Oh, well, maybe doing the indoor skydiving experience that I bought him for Christmas next weekend or the one after will make up for it.
It is interesting working so much. I don't mean like intellectually challenging, or fun, but one learns alot about their own character in pushing so hard. And I think that I still have a strong core, and a very positive attitude overall, and a massive desire to achieve goals. Some of the areas where I came up short were perhaps organisation. Overall, I have to say that I am pretty proud of what I have achieved. Actually, that is the other thing: I can say I achieved. Not my team, not the project, but me personally.
With a round of redundancies imminent (my bet is the 16th of January, and I put down £5 about a month ago on that), and my position formerly not wonderful in terms of vulnerability to these things, I feel like I have shown some of the most senior people in the company that I can and do perform (and have been, likewise, for the last 6 years, thank you very much), despite a very wrong attempt by a very poor IT manager to push me out last year (the fact that he was my boss at the time did not help matters, but that has now been taken care of). I needed this success for myself, and I need for this to be seen as a success by others. I think that both were achieved, and though that isn't in itself something to be proud of, I can definitely be proud of the project.
Now, back to bed!

Yes Man? Ya mon!

I saw the Jim Carey movie Yes Man last night before new years. I actually had wanted to see it, but didn't give myself much chance of seeing it in a cinema. This is one of the things that happens when you have kids: Cinema viewing tends to be of the animated or kid-friendly sort.
Unfortunately, or rather fortunately, the movie theaters at Leicester Square all cancelled their evening showings for New Years Eve. Except the one playing Yes Man and some horror flick. Since that was our only choice, Christopher's preference for animated films was ignored. He complained, but we ignored it.
Anyway, the movie got me thinking. It's premise, that just saying yes to things is a liberating thing, and helps get us out of a funk, and to really live life. Going out and doing things often seems like more trouble than staying home and watching television or reading a book. I have had periods in my life where I really wasn't interested in going out at all. Where I just wanted to veg out. Actually, 'want' is too strong a word: Where I didn't have the will to do much else would be more accurate.
Come on, get serious, who hasn't felt like that? I reckon it is a pretty sure sign of depression. And rebuffing people when they try to get you out of this, by saying no or making excuses, is also a sure sign. For me, I generally am fairly well tuned to my own moods, and am quite careful not to let myself go very far in that direction. The last worst time was in my first months in the UK, at exactly this time 3 years ago, when my family still hadn't joined me here, when I was poor because of all the expenses I had maintaining two houselholds and moving to a new country, and where there was just a lot to deal with. When I was a high-school student I reckon I was probably depressed most of the time. I was negative, and when someone reached out I put up barriers. I probably still do to some extent.
Anyway, the movie hit a chord with me. But it also made me think that I have changed.
I have a friend, Stuart, who is a bit of a sad case. Bad stuff just seems to happen to him, at least based on his telling of it. But a few years ago I told him I had a new and great job, and he said to me "you are so lucky, Nik. Good stuff just seems to happen to you." That really pissed me off a lot, for some reason, and also made me think.
Yes, I have been lucky, no doubt. But I look at the things that he thought made me lucky, and luck didn't really have much to do with it:

• I got married and had a family. Luck had nothing whatsoever to do with that. Having Christopher is the single greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I feel really blessed, but asking Meiko out, dating her, marrying her, and impregnating her were all things that I did, not that the universe did for me. Sure, the initial chance meeting was maybe luck, but come on...
• I wrote a book, which led to a better job. I was interested in the topic, mobile content development, and had a website about it, and was asked by an editor at John Wiley & Son's (at the time they were called something else, but they were acquired by JW&S before my book was published) if I would be interested in writing a book on developing for i-mode. Sure, it was lucky she saw my website, but it was me that put the site up, me that said 'yes' to whether I would like to write the book, and me that wrote for 15 hours a day for three months to finish the book.
• I landed a job with Vodafone. After my previous company went bust, leaving me jobless, I spent several months without work. I looked in Tokyo, because I knew that is where I wanted to work, rather than in Utsunomiya, where the prospects were somewhat slim. I networked, spoke to various recruiters, pursued any and all leads, despite not having a lot of really deep experience of the sort that was recognised, having worked independently doing web sites, translation, and writing. I won't say it was my own perserverence which landed me the job, but it was my own perseverence which meant that once I got the offer I was still in a place to accept the offer, rather than having settled for something else.
• I bought a house. Stuart is poor, and I grew up poor, not ever, after the age of 7, lived in a house that was owned by my family (and even before 7, both of the houses that met that criteria had belonged to my grandmother, not my own family). So, owning a house is a big deal. In this, I will concede that I was lucky. My wife inherited enough for a down payment, I had a good job, and getting a morgtage fixed at 3% for 35 years, while not the best deal right now, is pretty good. However, even this bit of luck came about because I had a good enough job (see above) to get a bank to lend me money.
  
• I was able to move to the UK with my company. My wife would argue that this was extremely unlucky, but for me, I am much more positive about it. My son has learned English, I have made some very good friends, and been involved in some great projects, we have gotten to travel in Europe, and it has been good (except the money, which has not been great). But this was, again, a case of someone believing in me. I count myself lucky to have such people, but their belief was based on what I had done.

I won't put down all of the things above to having said 'yes'. But most were. Or at least most were the result of being open.
Stuart, on the other hand, called me once when I was at lunch at work, and said
"Nik, I met this girl in an Internet cafe, and she said she wanted to come back with me to my apartment."
"Stu, you stud, that's great. It's been awhile, hasn't it?"
"I told her no."
"Why, was she ugly?"
"No. I just didn't feel right."
"Ok...so...she is basically telling you that she wants to have sex with you, and the problem is..."
"I just don't want to make a mistake."
"Like what? A mistake is saying no to something so generously offered!"
No doubt, Stuart is a doofus. And no doubt to him I seem really lucky. But I actually really agree with the premise of this film that saying 'yes' to what life has to offer creates this kind of luck.

New Years in London

We spent our New Years Eve in London, as can be seen by the video, which has Big Ben counting down to midnight, and the fireworks display over the Thames visible over the building. It was a very good night, though Christopher complained, because we didn't have the best view of the fireworks, and it took us forever to get to a tube station, since they had shut the ones nearest the Thames, and Victoria station had a 30 minute wait just to get on the tube. Still, definitely worth doing. We also saw a movie, Yes Man, which was good, and had a very reasonable and delicious Chinese dinner in Chinatown at a restaurant we often go to, but whose name I have no idea. Overall, a very nice evening, though we didn't get back home until about 3:30 am. Anyway, a happy 2009!